Fly in the Ointment?

Batting away criticism with a wave of his healing hand, the President squashed complaints from miscreant pests that he "flew off the handle" and harmed one of God's lovely li'l critters.

In prepared remarks, delivered with the aid of TOTUS, the president commented that he respects insects, welcomes their input in matters of pesticide control, standing-water breeding grounds, and refuse centers, such as New Jersey.

He pointedly noted, however, that he will ignore them and run roughshod over them like tanks over protesters in Tianenman Square, like the Soviets in the Velvet Rebellion, like Himself over the Constitution...

Billions of tiny little insect wings beat a raucous applause, even as B-52's poured DEET by the hectare over the quickly dying audience.